Lions and Panthers and Birkins, Oh My!!!

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to buy the iconic bag of all bags? The bag that fashionistas worldwide lust over and dream about. The bag that is so hard to get your hands on that you might be able to get your name on a five year waiting list to possibly purchase. The bag that is made by hand in Paris by a real Parisian for an entire year. Every stitch on the beautiful fine leather is hand stitched by hands and not some machine in China. A true work of art......

Yes ladies, I'm talking about the Hermes Birkin bag. I too have been intrigued by this horribly expensive granny looking bag. Of course I want one, and every time I see someone with one, or see it on TV or in a magazine....I want it even more! Hermes has me in there clever little trap, and well, I'm totally cool with that.

So, have you ever wondered if you could just go in like Samantha did on Sex in the City and actually hold and see the Birkin? Well, I have, so that is exactly what I sat out to do when I was in London.

The Pig and I took the Tube to Westminster and made our way through beautiful St. James park. It was a sunny fabulous day in London, so the park was swarming with loungers and picnickers. It looked fab, but we were on a mission to Bond Street. Bond Street is like the Rodeo Drive of London, and we were headed there to do some dreamy window shopping. We did however, make a quick stop at Buckingham Palace on our way for a photo op, so my parents wouldn't think I had lost my mind. Up St. James street, passed the guards in the crazy tall furry hats, right on Piccadilly......cross at the cross walk, and there we were! Bond Street! Where should we go first? I knew that I didn't have too much time before the Pig got restless so I walked with a little extra pep in my step straight to Chanel.

I felt good pushing the stroller in my "bond street shopping" outfit. It was very equestrian bohemian. The highlight of the look was my cute little Ikat print skirt from ZARA...short and full, and so "of the moment". I topped that off with a tight chocolate T from Banana Republic, and a tight brown corduroy blazer from Barneys. The outfit immediately took flight when I put on my tall caramel colored Frye Riding boots, classic Van Cleef gold clover necklace and big bangles for some extra bohemian chic; Chanel 255 worn across the body, and Chanel Diaper bag hanging from the Pig's stroller. Good duds, and a good look to let shop owners know.....I wasn't messin around.

Chanel wasn't a total bust, but somewhat. Nothing spoke to me or called out to me.......nothing like the orange Chanel tote in the Heathrow airport, but that is a whole other story for another day! I did get to see the leather Shop Tote that Andy, the head of handbags at our Neiman's told me about. It was totally not great, and mark my words, that bag will be all over Canal street! Those Chinese counter fitters love a bag with leather handles. I predict it will be knocked off as much as that poor quilted Chanel with the CC logo on the side. Needless to say, not a fan.

So we blew that joint and headed down the street. I saw Bottega, I saw YSL, I saw so many fabu shops! What I wasn't expecting to see was the Cartier Panthere Ring staring me down from the window. It was a diamond encrusted version that I had never seen, but my heart skipped a beat at the thought of them possibly having the gold version for me to see, hold, and dream about. The doorman opened the door for me, the guard smiled as I pushed the stroller in, and I instinctively went right, and there he was....in the case......so big, so beautiful, and soooooo fabulous! The store was impeccable, and the nice British lady that was on the phone when I walked in, quickly wrapped up her call to come over and help me. I love that! It doesn't take much to make some one's day. She was nice, and she didn't treat me like I had no business being in there....even though I didn't!

She asked if she could help me with anything, and I asked her if she could just show me the fabulous Panther ring. She said of course and told me to take a seat. This is what they do at Cartier.....you don't try things on at the counter, you go over to the brilliantly upholstered antique chair and take a load off as you ogle over their wears. She brought him over and gave him to me with a meer, "Isn't he exquisite?" I couldn't contain myself when I placed him on my finger......I said with a sigh, "he is Awesome!" I'm sure she's never heard him described as that, but she said she liked that word for him. He was so heavy and so huge: gold and black enlayed enamel with green sapphire eyes, and a perfect onyx nose. Your finger goes through his mouth, and he is magnificent!!! I loved having him on my finger. She told me all about the man who makes them for Cartier, and how she has seen his workshop. She then told me about the store and how the London location was only the second store the brother's opened back in 1902. The crown molding was to die for, the ceiling was gorgeous, and the chandeliers....well, they were Awesome! I told her that I so appreciated her showing me the mini sculpture, and that I would have dreams about it, and that maybe I would be lucky enough to own it someday. She totally understood, and wrote down all the information on the back of her card for me. She said that they don't make that many, and that only a few stores actually have them, so when that day comes....I could give her a call, and she would be happy to help me. I loved her! It is funny that out of all of the absolutely stunning pieces in there, and I mean stunning like the bracelet made out of pearl shaped cobachon rubies with a huge diamond clasp, I would choose the big gold panther that basically eats your finger all day. By the way, that panther was 13,000 pounds, meaning it was about $16,000. Ha!

After that, I felt like the day had just gotten even prettier outside. I knew that my timing with the Pig was dwindling. He loved Cartier, and he loved the Panther ring, but he wouldn't be loving things for too much longer. We were about to call it quits when we saw Burberry. I was about to cross the street, when I noticed that Hermes was just on the corner. I had to pop in to see about fondling a Birkin. I got to fondle the Cartier Panthere ring, so if there was no Birkin, I wouldn't be heartbroken. So, we walked in and asked the girl if she had a Birkin that I could just look at. I had to be careful how I phrased it because I didn't want to sound like a stupid "out of towner" who thought you could just walk in and buy a Birkin.....I wanted her to know that I knew a thing or two about them.

She said that she would have to check.....she left and came back a few minutes later with an excited and unsure look on her face. She said in a whisper to me, "We have one Birkin here, but it will take a few minutes." The Pig was starting to wince, but I told her we could wait, and I proceeded to do figure eights with the stroller throughout the boutique. There were only two women in there at that moment. They were looking at the scarves, and trying to decide which one to buy. My husband bought be my Hermes scarf for our anniversary a few years ago, so I was focused on the bag, and only the bag.

After what seemed like an eternity, the girl walked back downstairs with a huge orange Hermes box that was wrapped in plastic shrink wrap. The box was perfectly square, perfectly orange, and big enough to fit a cowboy hat inside. She took the plastic off, and went over to a drawer to grab some gloves. I guess they were the unveiling gloves. She was young, and seemed to be nervous and almost as excited as me. Maybe she hasn't really handled one either....who knows, and who cares, but what happened next was absolutely the chance of a lifetime!

She looked me deep in the eyes, and said, "this bag was for a customer who chose not to pick it up, so, you can buy it if you want." She said it quietly like we were two of the same, and like she wanted to sell it to me as bad as I wanted to buy it! It would be the first for us both....like some sort of wild Hermes bond that we would share forever. My heart raced as she took the top off of the box and revealed the coveted dust cover. She said to me, "it is 4,000, and the color is Taupe." Taupe, I said to myself....I like Taupe, Taupe is like the most versatile color on the color wheel.....everything goes with Taupe. Taupe could be my new favorite color: it could replace turquoise on all of those stupid email forwards that require you to insert useless personal info. Favorite Drink: Champagne, Favorite Vacation: Venice, Favorite Color: Taupe.

She took it out of the dust cover and it had protective felt all across the front with protective plastic covering all of the metal. I wondered if she was going to let me fondle it with my glove less hands, or if she would only let me hold it for a second like the shop guy in Sex in the City. I took it from her and went over to the mirror, felt still intacked, and plastic on for sure. I undid the lock like a seasoned pro, and held it down first, and then in the crook of my arm. It was fantastic! Even the Taupe looked exciting and vibrant. She pulled the felt off for me, and let me inspect it inside and out. By this time, a few women had walked into the store and were looking at me every so slightly. I'm sure they were thinking, "who is she that she gets to fondle a Birkin?" The funny thing is......I'm nobody, but I sure did feel like I was somebody, and somebody that was going to buy a Birkin! If I was single, I would have soooo considered it, and if it was Red, Brown, or Blue, it would have prompted a call to the Husband. I would have called him from my cell, completely forgetting that he was working, that the phone call probably cost about twenty dollars, and that he would have a small coronary embolism if I told him where I was, and what I was calling about. Thank God for Taupe! Once I felt like I had wasted the sweet girl's time enough, I told her that I needed to go because of the baby, but that I was definitely going to think about it. Sha!

Needless to say, I had a wonderful day of dream shopping! I got to feel the heavy weight of the one of a kind Cartier Panthere Ring on my finger, and I got to carry a real Birkin in the crook of my right arm for just a moment like it was mine. Can you imagine what kind of shopping bag it requires to carry that huge box out of the store? I'm sure it would have been big orange and fabulous in it's own destictly Hermes way. I did have orange in my Ikat print skirt that day, so it would have matched my outfit and my stroller brilliantly!

The Pig and I went straight to the park and bought a four dollar lunch that consisted of a cheese sandwich and a banana. I threw down our blanket and we had a picnic in the beautiful park, him, playing with the water bottle, and me, sitting there in my riding boots and skirt, basking in the glow of what the future holds. What a day on Bond Street!