Naked Fashionista

So, we got to the airport, and not only did delta not let Marc get on the plane; they took off the wrong bag. Yes people, I am here on safari with my husbands 27 pound bag of nothing. No undies, no cute snake boots, no safari button downs, no blush colored relaxed skinny jeans, no cute khaki safari jacket with pockets for all your shit. Yeah, I'm pretty much here with no husband, and a Delta sky team t-shirt. I do have the jeans I traveled in, and my mom has an extra pair of boots. Our professional hunter Tony got to know me really well at the airport when he took me into some hoochie store called Woolworths for some undies, a t-shirt (that fits), a long sleeve, a button down, and some tampons. Nothin like picking out some panties with a man you just met standing over your shoulder planning to pay for all of it. He encouraged me to get a pair of jeans, but he obviously doesn't know me very well. I would rather wear these seven Dojo jeans for a year than wear some flared dark denim with sparkly butterflies on the ass pockets. And, I figured the cat was out of the bag at that point (about the tampons), so I just asked him what I had unsuccessfully googled....."am I going to get attacked by a flesh eating animal since I have my monthly bill?" Don't worry people, I'll be safe. I guess I'll wear Marc's safari jacket tomorrow. It's either that or my khaki J.Crew grandpa sweater. I'm also taking one of his knives so I can feel a little like Cadmus, or whatever her name is from The Hunger Games. I'll have to take photos with my trusty IPhone since yes, my freakin camera was in my bag too. Oh well, thank god I'm with my parents and not my in-laws. My mom has enough mascara and blush to share. ;) Thus, let's hope for the safe arrival of one handsome husband and one bag full of fabulous safari fashions. I'm going to rock what I have people. It's gonna be great! Tomorrow, we are in search of a sable.